Our wedding: Before the ceremony!

I can't believe that two weeks ago tomorrow I was eagerly waiting to set up our wedding venue. We've since been on a short mini moon, received the official photos, put our house on the market and have gone back down to real life with a thump-I feel a bit lost! We still haven't shown James' parent's the photos but I can't wait any longer, and we are seeing them Saturday anyway!

The wedding eve

The night before the wedding James left me at the venue at 8pm for a meal with his family, I put the boys to bed, wrote a post and sat on my with my own thoughts for the night, the occasional text or message through facebook to tell me to get an early night! 

I tried that early night but it didn't really work, the nerves were already cranking up, I couldn't even get through a piece of toast for dinner that night!

I was pleasantly surprised when James skyped me at midnight, a bit naughty I know, but it calmed us both greatly. 

The wedding day

I woke at 6.45am (not bad really as didn't think I'd sleep at all) and shortly after the boys came bounding in like they normally do. 

Only Alex made me cry happy tears:

"Good morning wedding Mum! You're going to be a Spencer today"

It melted my heart, for today was the day we could finally be a proper family, I could finally write the same surname as my children on school forms, for the first time in nearly 5 years I could really be one of them.

I gave the boys breakfast, and tried to have a  drink myself, I couldn't stomach the food through the nerves, in fact I didn't eat a single thing my whole wedding day! I think that morning I had more rescue remedy than anything else!

I gave the boys a bath and rounded up our things before being picked up by Mum and heading off to theirs. 

My hairdresser (an old friend from school) was already waiting so it was straight into wedding makeover mode!

I had mine done first whilst 2 of the bridesmaid turned up and my brothers got their brekkie in their pjs (classy eh?)!!

I don't think I spoke much, and didn't appreciate the free head space for me to worry-but my bridal party tried their best to calm my nerves and tried and failed to make me eat too!

My hair was perfect, so much better than I ever expected as I felt it looked better than my hair trail a few months previous, the flowers gave it that extra special touch too as I didn't want a veil and I don't really do sparkles/hairpieces!

You can see me nervously biting my lip!
 We actually took the big rose in the middle out after as it kept falling out. 

The bridesmaids and then Mum had their hair done and looked amazing too. 

Beautiful bridesmaids

My lovely Mum

Mum's friend then came around to do my make-up and Mum's, at this point I really felt ill and a bit overcome with emotions. Any time anyone mentioned when we needed to go or asked me anything about the day I would nearly be in tears, of course I didn't-I didn't want to ruin my make-up!

James' sister came just before 2 after having her hair done, and we all got changed shortly after that-it ended up being a bit of a rush that last bit, I think we all could have done with getting ready sooner-mind you the boys we last to change as I didn't want them to ruin their lovely suits!!

Mum's friend dropped out gorgeous bouquets off (which I still feel super guilty about as the peonies really caused a LOT of hassle)!

The cars turned up and then that was it, it was finally happening. 

I was dead quiet in the car, Dad kept trying to talk to me, but I would only answer with yes or no's or as short as I possibly could. Luckily James' Uncle who was driving us had air con on as the nerves were making me so hot! 

We literally got every single red light on the way, my nerves were ok as they could be when travelling but as soon as we stopped at those red lights my heart would race and I felt so sick!

We arrived at the church, the vicars waiting for us, a quick snap from our photographer and I stepped out of the car, had a giggle with everyone about Dad chatting to his friend instead of being by my side! 

And then took my last steps as Danielle Askins.